Last time I spoke of determination and fighting for your dream. I also spoke of how negativity can tear at your soul if you allow it to get to you. Do you remember when we were kids and we’d say little defensive sayings like this one: “I’m rubber and you are glue, whatever you say sticks to you.”

We may not always be able to be as strong as rubber, but perhaps when we get sidelined with seemingly innocent statements like: “What’s that supposed to be?’ or “Don’t quit your day job.”

We can think of a defense like being rubber and imagining those words bouncing off of us and harmlessly falling to the ground.

The key is to dust yourself off as quickly as you can and not lose track of your dream. That truly is the best revenge. Try not to stress if it takes you a bit of time. Sometimes those closest to us cut us the deepest. The deeper the cut the longer it takes to heal.

Dive back into your work as soon as you can. When you do, don’t be surprised if your art reflects how you’re feeling at the time. As artists, our environment and our emotions affect us. Before you know it you’ll be your ol’ self again.

Another way to shake off the negative is to give back and inspire others.

Imagineers do this. I can think of so many: Bob Gurr, Alice Davis, Marty Sklar and Tony Baxter and the list goes on. Have you ever heard any one of them say, “Get away from me, you bother me.”?  Never. They’re always at your service and almost always positive. They always seem to have time to speak to you wherever they are around.

I recently spoke to a group of young ladies at an organization called Hands for Hope. This is an organization that helps troubled kids and provides a place for them to go when their parents can’t be at home because they are working. The kids go here and can study, create, council and help each other. It’s a terrific group.

There were just under a dozen in the group when I arrived. I love intimate small groups. I began my talk by asking the girls to tell me a little about themselves. Most went quiet and looked at their feet.

Silence.

Then I asked if they had ever been bullied. They all raised their hands. Ever notice that many troubled kids have been bullied? I told them I had been bullied too and that art helped me to cope with not only my anger but after a while a funny thing happened. . . They were all looking at me with rapt attention. I explained that when my art finally surfaced and people started to look it over not only did I begin to change but the bully changed too. He stopped bothering me. It’s a weird and crazy thing. Who can say why, he just backed off.

Then one girl spoke. “I’ve tried to commit suicide three times.”
“How old are you?”
“15.”
“What made you attempt suicide?”
“I was tired of being bullied.”

So I asked the girls if they would help me understand. The 15 year old spoke again.

“I just wanted it to stop, I was tired and I wanted it to be over.”
The other girls were nodding.
“What stopped you from trying again?”
“It’s just like you said, Terri. I found art. Would you like to see?”
I smiled and said yes.

Her first suicide attempt had been when she was 11. Turns out many of the girls had similar situations. They all said that the thing that helped them stop was having been introduced to the arts.

Think of it, and it’s the first thing that is taken out of our schools.

I suggested that we all show our art to each other. They were so excited and they jumped up to get their work. Before me lay all types of art and it was amazing, each piece telling a story.

Some girls painted, some drew and a couple expressed themselves through dance and performance.

As you might expect, the 15 year old had very angry art. The art had lots of black and red and told a story of distance and isolation.

That was the beginning of her work and as she healed she told me, her art began to change. She felt confident and knew she’d never try to take her own life again. She was smiling. She had just finished a mural for inside the Hands for Hope building.

We all went out to take a look and the evening became a time for sharing dance, portfolios and stories. Her mural was uplifting and beautiful depicting the joy she felt at Hands for Hope. She had transformed. Now her thoughts were full of how to move forward and continue that which she had discovered.

As I looked into her smiling face, I noticed she was a very pretty girl and I asked her why she had been bullied.

I have this skin disorder. It comes and goes, but it’s not pretty.”

I looked at her skin and could see her skin looked scabbed and cracked here and there, but you really had to look to see it.

The fact is anyone can be bullied for any reason. If a bully decides you’ll be their target, that’s all it takes. However, I’ve discovered that when a person bullies you it’s often because there’s something broken in them not you. Food for thought.

I was only supposed to be there for an hour, but you know how that goes. I really wanted to tell these girls that there was a way for them to create art for a living.

All of their eyes grew wide as they imagined the various careers they might pursue. It was awesome.

Some of you might be wondering what does this have to do with Disney? Is Terri off on another tangent?  NO.

You all love Disney. All of you are creative. Isn’t it you obligation to share this with as many people as you can? You don’t want to keep this joy to yourselves do you? You know how wonderful it makes you feel.

I’m not saying you have to get in front of people or address a big group. Giving back and being of service can happen one person at a time. Take baby steps.

If you see someone sad or struggling, start by smiling and then say something nice.

For example, have you ever stood in a long line at a grocery store? You look around and see that there are no other checkout stations open and you sigh. . . Now’s your chance.

At this point you can be one of two types of people. You can be person number 1. When you get up to the counter you let loose your anger and lay into the checker telling her how dissatisfied you are with the store, her performance, the day, whatever. You make sure to let her know your time is valuable and can’t she move any faster? How do you think the cashier felt afterward?

OR

You could be person number 2. While standing in line you observe that this checker is struggling to keep up and you can see that their breathing is rapid, and they’re breaking a sweat. You notice the current customer in line yelling and scolding the cashier and you consider that the cashier is probably wondering what you’re wondering. Why aren’t there any co-workers to be found coming to help? When you get up to the counter you smile and lift the tone by saying something funny or assuring. By keeping your voice up and smiling, the cashier will laugh, tension gone.

In an instant, in this small way you’ve made them feel better. You’ll see that they’ll smile and thank you.

Sometimes all it takes is saying hello or telling someone it’s great to see them again.

It’s so simple, right? But many of us forget we can do this every day.

Try it and you’ll see that you not only make another person feel better, but you feel better as well. Because good will is infectious.

It’s magical, like channeling the Disney spirit you all love. Wonderful!

It can be any act of kindness. Try it and let me know how it goes.

What acts of kindness have you done lately? Share it here and it could help someone again.

Learning to bounce back from adversity and helping others do so as well is an ESSENTIAL skill for creatives. If you want to be an Imagineer, you need to develop that rubber skin. If you can assist others into recovering from their downward spirals, it makes you essential.

FEEDBACK

First, hang in there with me as MiceChat works with me so that I can start to answer your comments in a more timely fashion. There’s a new comments system that was just installed this week. It’s pretty snazzy, but I’ve still got to figure it all out.  So, here are some answers to comments and questions from my last column:

Thank you HT77,I loved hearing from you about your creativity and collaboration. Viva sweat equity!

Klutch: I appreciate you letting me know what you want to hear about in the future,  next time I will address a bit of that. I agree, too many young people today think that all it takes is a contest and then POW! You’re in. I’m not saying you can’t do it this way, but don’t think those who have won contests like that worked very hard to get there.

Thanks to all of you who were kind enough to post encouraging word about my article and my writing. I’m truly grateful for all of you.

And remember, you can also reach me via email.

[email protected]

MiceChat 10 Year Anniversary

I have to give a shout out to Dusty Sage. Wow, the MiceChat 10th Anniversary was off the chain amazing!

I’ve never seen anything like it. The part that blew my socks of was when hundreds of us stood to take the group photo on the steps of the Disneyland Train Station. As we all posed to have the photo taken, everything stopped. Disneyland Photographers took the photo and the Main Street Vehicles waited, the horses waited . . .and then Mickey Mouse came out to join our photo while Donald Duck directed. It was a heart warming moment that really made me feel great.

The other neat thing is I got to be a speaker on MiceChat’s “Yesterland” tour. Wow! What a neat idea for a tour and such amazing surprises along the way. Thank you to those of you who took the time to introduce yourselves and let me know that you’ve read my articles. It means a lot to me.

THIS WEEK I Fly up Washington to brainstorm with a couple of artists looking to work with me on a Joint-venture. Please keep your fingers crossed for me.

Then I’m off to a College Speaking Bootcamp near LAX airport where many people gather to learn from James Malinchak. James teaches the marketing of a career in Speaking. Passion is one thing, but marketing can help pay your rent.

And finally, be sure to check in with MiceChat often,  Dusty and I are working on a few surprises which could be coming your way soon.

Now, back to you . . . when things start to spiral out of control for you, how do you lift yourself out of it? How do you help others?